If you’d like to send her care packages, mail them c/o LSUS’s Grading Oubliette. We’ll poke it through the bars of her cage:

I think I caught the drifting strains of, “I’ll bastardize your predicates,” sung to the theme song of Young Guns, just a little while ago. Which means it’s time for Nicole’s rainwater and day old bread. We’ll let her enjoy it in peace.

As you’ve probably already figured out, I have a bit of a potty mouth. And by “a bit” I mean a rat infested sewer of a mouth. As a wee little girl from Niddrie (a council estate near Edinburgh) told my friend, in a lovely Scottish accent, no less: “I love swearing. It’s fucking great.”

I come from a family of swearers, I am a swearer, and many of my friends are swearers . . . so when I find something that shocks me–that reminds me of the power of a truly inspired bit of obscenity–it’s gotta be pretty extreme.

Therefore, if you don’t like swearing, never, ever go near the following film, although this theatrical trailer is (relatively) clean:

The film is In the Loop and it’s up for an Oscar. All I know is it’s one of the best films I’ve seen in years. On a superficial level, it is utterly, absolutely entertaining. I laughed through the entire film, as did all of my friends. I want to see it again because not only were the lines so rapidly delivered, but everyone in the theater was laughing so hard, at times, that it was hard to hear. It felt like I sat down, started laughing, and then suddenly it was all over, leaving me wanting more.

That said, the film is also brilliant, with one of the bleakest, most frightening portrayals of modern politics I’ve ever seen. It’s easy to miss, simply because you’re too busy watching the characters tear around insulting everyone. But underneath all that humor, In the Loops suggests that modern politics are still as much about ego, competitiveness, and personal aggrandizement as Shakespeare depicted them in King Lear. Only the weapons have changed, making the stakes so very much higher and deadlier.

With fantastic performances all around, and a storyline that works on a number of levels, I can’t recommend In The Loop enough.

And speaking of King Lear, my second recommendation is Christopher Moore’s The Fool:

Bawdy and irresistible, this is another story that works on two levels. I was pinging from one image to another (little man in a canoe!) and reveling in the language of this work, but meanwhile the literary academic in me was squealing over the layers of allusions to various Shakespeare productions. I adored this book, as did all of the ladies in my book club. And it wasn’t just the Chatham Artillery Punch, talking, either!

So if you’re bored this weekend, try to get your hands on either of these fantastic works. Due to the Oscar nod, In the Loop is back in theaters (especially independents) the Fool is coming out in paperback any second. Both will floor you with their use of language, but also with their wit and intelligence. Filthy AND smart . . . it’s a combination I find absolutely irresistible.

And just because I’m in the mood for a little heinous fuckery,* here’s a picture of my trifle:

The song was, indeed, originally, “my trifle brings all the boys to the yard,” till that bitch changed it.

Fuckstockings!*

*For true heinous fuckery in action, you have to read The Fool

*Ditto

But first, just a few things . . .

To see my take on why I chose to write sex in my mainstream fiction, you can go here.

Ever wondered Why-A? Mark Henry answers you here.

Finally, thought my interview with Victoria Schwab was inappropriate? Wait till you see this one, with Courtney Allison Moulton. It’s here.

So . . . . are you ready to see who the weiner is? Are you excited? Are you all, “Shut the fuck up, Nicole, and tell us who won ALL FOUR of these amazing debut novels?”

The contest can has spoken!

And the weiner is Paige Cuccaro!!!!!!!!!!!

Huzzah!

Email me at iheartselkies(at)gmail(daht)com, and I will have Amazon expedite you some debut novel goodness.

For those of you who did not win, you should definitely go buy all four of these books this weekend. Go. Now! Or I’ll interview you!!!!!!!

My interview with Victoria Schwab, debut YA novelist, is here. I swear a blue streak. Maybe an indigo streak. Enjoy.

Be back at the League Friday, with another YA debuter’s interview. This one might be worse. It is one in which I am Full of Ideas (never a good sign!).

Check yourself before you wreck yourself, Loretta!

And because this is such a big event, and because I’m running ANOTHER BIG EVENT over at the League of Reluctant Adults, YA Week!, I thought I’d run a contest THIS week, here.

First of all, let me show you what’s up for grabs . . .

The lucky winner of this contest receives NOT ONE . . .NOT TWO . . . NOT THREE! . . . BUT FOUR BOOKS!

Yes, FOUR BOOKS!

In no particular order, here is the prize…

First off, we have Mark Henry’s new release, Battle of the Network Zombies!

Next, we have my AMAZING critique partner, Diana Rowland’s, Blood of the Demon! I’ve read this one, it’s HAWT!

Third up is Stacia Kane’s Demon Possessed!

And, finally, last but not least, Anton Strout’s Dead Matter!

All of these novels launch tomorrow, February 23rd. And I’ll send all four books directly to the winner of this contest.

To enter yourself into the running, just answer the following question in comments: “Which would you rather be, a hot, fashionable, zombie socialite; a demon summoner who gets hawt sex with her side of Demon Lord; the actual head of a demon family, who gets to fraternize with other heads of demon families (Greyson! Greyson!); or a super secret, super agent for the Department of Extraordinary Affairs?”

In other words, I think I’m asking would you rather BE the supernatural? Or the human who gets to fraternize with supernaturals?

Answer that question in comments in as much depth as you would like, and that’ll put you in the running to win these four books. I’ll choose a winner FRIDAY February 26th at noon, randomly, and announce the winner here.

In the meantime, you can see me get up to all sorts of shenanigans over at the League. Because it’s YA week! And I have some REALLY GOOD ideas on how I, Nicole Peeler, can enter into the YA world with a bang. Literally.

You know you want to see this in action . . .

They’re two bands that aren’t really things I like . . . they’re things I LOVE. Both have been around forever, but they’re huge influences on me. Pretty much every action scene I write is, in my mind, soundtracked by one of these bands. They’re on every single one of my playlists, so whenever you come over to my house you’ll hear them, off and on, throughout your visit. In other words, they’re my most beloved background noise.

This first band is pretty much always on in my house. It’s what I work out to, work to, and absolutely adore. I love this band because I associate them with my brother (who is a huge fan) and because I went to undergrad in Boston and it is like nostalgia in a lyric. It is, of course, the Dropkick Murphys. Here’s one of my favorite songs:

And this little ditty always gets me going at the gym:

I may also have a wee crush on the guitarist. And the piper. His KNEES are tattooed! Le sigh.

The second band is also from Boston, and they also make me very, very happy. Again, they’ve been around forever and they will often open for the Murphys. Heaven! No doubt you’ve already guessed . . . it’s The Mighty Mighty Bosstones. Here’s one taste . . .

This video is AMAZING. And for your second taste, here’s a song I am slightly obsessed with at the moment:

So here are two of my major musical influences. Not what you expected? Or just what the Doctor ordered?

You can see all three covers, and Orbit’s take on the series, here. Careful, there are some spoilers in their description. For a spoiler free synopsis, click here.

What do you think?

While I’m disappointed to miss my friend’s baby shower, I also can now admit that I am really sick. I don’t know where this cold came from! It snuck up on me like a ninja assassin.

So I’m going to spend the weekend in, probably, which is not a bad thing. Here is my list of things to do:

• Book Three Edits
• Grade Papers
• Read Modern Poetry
• Read Oedipus Rex
• Read Fool
• Clean
• Blog For the Future
• Float on a Theraflu Fog
• Watch Avatar: The Last Airbender
• Sleep
• Sleep
• Sleep
• Eat
• Sleep
• Maybe Sleep Some More
• And Then Sleep

Sound good? If I’m recovered enough by Sunday I’ll go watch the Highland parade . . . that’s if I’m not sleeping.

Oh yeah, and it’s Valentine’s Day! Here’s my valentine to you . . .

In the meantime, enjoy this brilliant response to the Superbowl commercial posted in the blog post beneath this one:

I think this says it all. Thanks, Louisa Hadley, for showing it to me!

Have a great weekend, a safe but louche Mardi Gras, and don’t get V-D on V-Day.

Did y’all see this one?

And did you catch the thing about vampires? “I will watch your vampire TV shows with you.”

I don’t know where to begin! When did vampires stop being the purview of the horror fan and become, instead, another thing a dude tolerates to please his wife? Here, vampires are depicted as the equivalent of some fanged scented candle or a caped feminine hygiene product.

I think this is really interesting. I think we need to break this down. What does this commercial say about the vampire, about women, about women and vampires, about “real” men, and about the Dodge Charger?*

Comments wanted!

*Fine, I don’t actually give a toss about the Charger. But lemme know if you do!