Guest Post! Smexy Times with Annika Martin!

Hey folks. Nicole here. Today I’m turning the Emporium over to Annika Martin, who writes erotic romance. Since I know absolutely nothing about the subject *coughs delicately*, I thought you might be interested in hearing from an expert. Also, her book looks great. It’s about all you need to kick start your summer, just make sure you have a pitcher of sweet tea handy to quench the flames.

 

Hello Nicole! I’m so thrilled you invited me here to your blog.

 

Five random things about being an erotica writer…and a giveaway!

 

* 1 *

Way back in the mists of time I used to imagine that erotica writers must be really sexually adventurous in real life. Like super liberated and together in bed and possibly wild. I know this doesn’t make sense because, you know, Nora Roberts didn’t suddenly go around solving crimes when she started the In Death series. I’m sure you, Nicole, didn’t start swimming in icy water and boffing strange creatures when you began writing UF. (Or maybe you did!! Maybe that’s your secret!!)

 

However, as an erotica writer, I can report that the major difference is that you spend way more time dreaming up dirty scenarios than the average person, and that’s pretty much the big difference. Or at least, that’s been my experience! Actually, I believe erotica readers in general have better sex lives, but I don’t think it matters if you are an erotica reader or writer.

 

* 2 *

It’s totally weird to write erotic scenes in coffee shops!! And it never gets less weird for me. It’s just funny to be two feet away from a stranger, and they’re reading the paper with their morning coffee and you’re typing away:

 

He #$% her #$# and then he @$& and she growled, I’ll @#%$ your #%#* with a #$@!!

 

 And then you go up to the counter and order another lovely lemon scone.

 

* 3 *

Being an erotic romance writer is one of those things a person doesn’t tell many real life people, or at least, I don’t go around telling. So it’s this big secret. It’s kind of like being a secret agent with a secret agent life. A secret agent of sexy smut!

 

* 4 *

Do you remember the Chandra Levy case? The girl that disappeared in Washington DC? The police searched through her computer and read all her emails and followed her online trails extensively. At least that is my memory, that her computer life was totally picked apart and revealed to the world in excruciating detail. I felt bad for her. Sometimes I have this paranoid thought after I write a really dirty thing that, what if I die in questionable circumstances that night? What would news reports say?

 

I do some pretty odd research – not just sex research, but gun research and poison research and bank robbery research. Let’s face it, it doesn’t look good when taken out of context. I can totally imagine the newscasters warning the TV audience to turn off their sets if children are about while reveal what crazy dirty-minded Annika Martin was up to before she disappeared.

 

* 5 *

I would pay good money to get some of the old-fashioned words for vagina back in use, specifically quim and cunny. I am so tired of “her cleft” and “her sex,” and cunt seems to bug people, so it has to be used sparingly. Pussy bugs me. I use all of the above, but cripes, wouldn’t it be great to have quim and cunny back? The historical writers have it pretty easy with their quim sand their cunnies. Those are fabulous words. There are so, so many good historical sex part words. I wish we could have them back.

 

* A contest! *

Okay! There you have it, FIVE random things. And, to go with our five random things, we’re giving away a copy of HOSTAGE BARGAIN to a random commenter! This giveaway starts now and ends at a random time on the morning of Thursday the 10th, EST.

Nicole again. To up the ante I’ve convinced Denise Townsend to ALSO donate a copy of Ocean’s Touch. So basically if you win, you get a smut twofer. NICE.

 

Rules:

Tell us who YOU would love to be the bread in your sandwich OR come up with the most ridiculous premise for an erotic romance you can think of. Be sure to leave your email address, or else your email should be available through us clicking your name. That’s  it! We’ll choose a winner the morning of FRIDAY, MAY 18th. This is an ebook; open internationally.

 

About THE HOSTAGE BARGAIN:
This is a book of erotic romance, or more, erotic romantic suspense. It’s a category-length novel (56k words).

 

BLURB:

When small town girl Melinda Prescott is taken hostage by three hot bank robbers, she quickly discovers that a life of bank heists, luxury hotels, and kinky menages is way more exciting than working on the family sheep farm. She should be scared of her dominating, fierce captors…but there’s something wicked inside her that’s craving to obey their every dark desire.

 

Melinda’s an all-too willing captive to three smoldering sex maniacs…but is it all too good to be true? Will her delicious captors overcome their own demons enough to let her in…or is she going to end up a victim of the world’s sexiest crime spree?

 

Warning: This book contains a sexy bank-robbers-and-their-captive sandwich, light bondage, spanking, teasing hints of domination, and a little play-time in a hot tub. Oh, and some all too delicious, villainous alpha heroes who bend the heroine to their will.

 

Learn more about Annika Martin and all of her projects at www.annikamartinbooks.com.

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9 Responses to “Guest Post! Smexy Times with Annika Martin!”


  • How about a Julian Rhind-Tutt and Josh Duhamel sandwish. Yummy.
    pamblakekenlilly@yahoo.com

  • My "sandwich" would consist of Barrons from Karen Marie Moning's Fever series and Christian from Fifty Shades of Grey. Two very sexy and very controlling characters. YUM!

  • Can't pick an actor/celebrity- none interest me. Like the poster above, I would choose Barrons, but I have no interest in Christian. Now, Ranger (from Evanovich's Plum series) on the other hand-Yum!

  • 2. Come up with the most ridiculous premise for an erotic romance you can think of:

    Bored and alone on a Friday night, Kate invites her college friend Derek over to eat Doritos and watch reruns of Friends. Derek, also alone and decidedly sans plans (thanks to his slight glandular problem), joins Kate for the evening. Bored, lonely, and fairly desperate, will Kate fall far enough to give Derek a quick handy while watching the drama of Ross' wedding?

  • haha! These are awesome you guys! I love the tasty sandwiches you have come up with – Nice!!!! And handjob during Ross's wedding? LOL.

  • Well, I love my book characters so it's very hard coming up with only two, so rather than simply a menage a trois I would much rather have a roomful. I would choose Roarke , Rhyzkahl, Acheron, Jean Claude, Trent Kalamak, and Wicked and Truth. I'm sure there are more that I'm missing, but at the moment I would be very happy with these seven. in fact, I am going to have very erotic, sweet dreams tonight as these fantasy men come to life in my head.

  • Don't enter me in the contest…I already read and loved this book!

    Story idea: A shape-shifting weenie dog/lumberjack is attacked by a posse of zombies in the isolated mountains of Maine, but an adorable maple syrup specialist who just happens to be passing by saves him by knocking out the zombies with her metal syrup buckets. And then they have kinky, syrup-y sex in his log cabin, and let's not even talk about what happens when he turns into a weenie dog during the full moon. How's that?

  • Tonya: haha a roomful! You will be busy!

    Penelope: oooh! kinky and sticky!

  • In response to the first fact, it could be more weird.
    You could be trying to write the novel with one of those dictation programs while in said coffee shop.

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